Dying in order to Live….
Time and space loses all measurement in the eyes of the universe. Most of us are afraid of death, of leaving this terrain space with all we hold dear behind. I for one, I’m terrified, but not terrified at the prospect of dying no, but rather at the prospect of not leaving my life fully. This talk of death may sound a bit morbid and inconsequential to our everyday list of “important” things to do, however many of us live in the light as walking zombies. I can only speak for myself really, I can’t remember the last time I was really alive.
There is a cemetery close to where I live. I usually go there to walk and be with myself, in one of those walks I came across and old tomb without an epitaph attached to it. The tomb’s location is magnificent, next to a massive ancient tree in the middle of the cemetery. I was standing there just staring at the tomb when it occurred to me that I should bury my past there, the old me, all the pain and the sorrow. Since that day I go at least once a month to take flowers and talk to the old me. Is not like I’m crazy but I see it as a meaningful and therapeutic ritual to let go of the past and move forward. The only problem is that the old me refuses to die completely, but die she must in order for the new me to come alive
Often we bury our true selves deep inside of us so we won’t affect the status quos, so that we won’t disappoint the view others have of us. I am guilty of that sin, for as long as I can remember I have lived this other life completely incongruent with my essence. I need to move forward but to do that I must have the courage to the old me die, to let her rest in peace. The universe constantly pushes us forward to new challenges. It brings about opportunity disguised in change; the most amazing part of change is the freedom we experience once we are able embrace it.