I was seating in that lonely corner in my house, filled with memories that once made me happy but now… all is left is an empty space, a void reservoir of nothingness.
Where do I go to pick up the pieces of my life – when it’s all broken like the phoenix’s ashes scattered by the wind.
I walk around the house with a box in my arms, I put away the remains of a life that passed me by without any remembrance of actual love or happiness. While I draw hearts with my tears on the cold ceramic floor of my empty house. Words spring to mind~ acceptance ~ re – adjustment ~ solace ~ introspection but… what do these words mean when you are not longer able to feel. Like a stone in a cemetery, like the rock that’s constantly splashed by the sea current.
Oh I wish I could feel again….
But all I feel is loss, emptiness and loneliness….
After days of lying down staring at the ceiling, looking for answers on the limitless white galaxy that connects my four wall to the sky – I suddenly understand, melancholy whispers in my ear and tells me: “Re-adjust, just re-adjust.” and I say: “How do you do that?”
and she replies ” embrace the pain, the loneliness and what is, instead of what isn’t.”
“sounds simple enough.” I said. And then I asked the dead jasmines to lend me a hand and help me to get up to do that thing…re-adjust. “It hurts.” I said to my friend melancholy and she said: “It’s the only way forward.”