Today I have been feeling a little down. Sometimes I cannot find that zest or fulfilment, it is however in these moments of sadness, loneliness and depression when our inner depth opens up. I was just reading a book on creative writing and as part of the exercise I had to write for five minutes about five random things, without stopping to analysing or criticise my writing. I would like to share with you my nonsense:
1. Garden furniture
I don’t know much about garden furniture but I do love gardens. My mum has a lovely patio – and in that patio she has a few pieces of furniture. There is a lovely round wooden table with capacity to seat four people, there is also a wooden bench and my favourite, a rocking chair for two people – it is such a beautiful piece of furniture. Seating there I feel back in time – in a romantic period of love – where people took the time to have conversations. Where the girl sat looking beautiful & innocent yet with an air of passion and desire in her veins. When I seat or rock in that chair I wish to have a handsome, intelligent and sweet man next to me, to talk, hold and feel love in and around us.
2. Marilyn Monroe
Although I haven’t read her biography or watched all of her films, I have a pretty good understanding of her persona. I can definitely relate to her sense of loss, pain and emotional need for love. She was obviously a very beautiful and sensual woman but far from that being a recipe for love and stability, in her case it became a kind of curse. All she wanted I guess was to be loved, to be taken care of, no just to be admired for her beauty or seen as a sex symbol. We all need love and Marilyn Monroe was no exemption. But like Marilyn, we sometimes look for love in all the wrong places and the disappointment of not having our expectations fulfilled is crushing and devastating. She just wanted to be loved.
3. The earth’s core
Ok, this is a subject I know nothing about, and there is not much point in researching this topic because the idea of this exercise is to write whatever comes to mind without stopping to analyse or correct. The earth is a magnetic field. As a mortal on this earth I can sincerely say that everyday I feel more and more alien. I always heard that with age comes maturity but I don’t think that is always the case. I won’t disclose my age but I can tell you that I have a few years on my back – but even so I still feel like a little girl sometimes. I wish I could fly around the earth and lose myself between one planet and the next.
I love eagles. They are so free and so strong. They posses a number of qualities which I admire and wish to have, those are:
- independence and I guess happiness.
They come and go as they please and form homes where the sunset draws in. On countless occasions I wished I was an eagle with strong wings to fly high, very high and feel the wind on my skin.
Sometimes I wish I was an eagle.
They carry so much hope with them just like the start of a new relationship. The anticipation, all the colours, the sparkles, losing themselves in the sky…the shapes and sounds are all part of a beautiful display. The problem is that it doesn’t last very long – you must seize the moment and fully engage in the passing happiness of fireworks. The spark of fireworks awakes in us the inner child – that happy and spontaneous child that only lives for the moment, that doesn’t linger in the past hurts or disappointments, neither does he/she want to fast-forward to the future. Because is enjoying the present and that’s all there is to it. Next time I see fireworks I will thank my lucky stars for being alive and for the moment.